If you Dig Jewels

Okay, admit it. I love jewelry! More specifically, I love jewels. I collect them and my collection is collecting collectables continually. Me? I mostly collect necklaces and pendants. Why? Because my neck is the only part of my body that isn’t overly busy. I know what you’re thinking – it’s plenty busy holding my head up! However, I assure you, my neck is actually holding my head down (not the other way around). It’s more like a string for a kite than the average neck. Thus, it deserves decoration … like those little bows. And it has preferences – let me explain them.

My neck does not like diamonds. I know that seems odd, but they’re tiny and overpriced. A zircon is chemically the same thing, if not a superior product with better brightness and clarity for a fraction of the price. Why are we still wearing diamonds?

My neck does not like bright blue stones. I do not wear sapphires, blue topaz, lapis lazuli, or turquoise. Leave that to some girl with blue eyes. Not only that, but if you put blue against my skin, it makes my neck (and the rest of me) look green. I can’t own things that I can’t wear, so even though I think all those stones are pretty, I can’t collect things that don’t flatter me. My neck’s collection will always have holes in it. Poor neck!

My neck does not wear a necklace every day. Wearing your jewelry wears it out. It’s good for the stones you’re wearing to have moisture in them and they usually get it from your skin. However, most precious metals that are used in jewelry are soft and overtime – that’s right – they wear thin. Jewelry that has been worn over a lifetime is not usually fit to be worn again, so if you want your daughter to wear your (fill in the blank), you’d better not wear it every day.

Also, some of my necklaces have quite a bit of weight to them. Since this is all for my neck, I don’t want to make it live its whole life with a heavy chain around it. It needs a certain amount of freedom. And some of my necklaces are rather pointy. I have seriously rolled over in the middle of the night and got a jab. Oops! Forgot to take off my kite string decoration.

And we shouldn’t stop at just necklaces for adorning our throats. There are scarves – pretty scarves. And turtlenecks! Don’t even get me started on how much I love sweaters. And wool sometimes has sparkles in it now, not to mention how soft and warm and … I’m hyperventilating.