Hamlet's Mom

The following is a parody I wrote for the song Stacy’s Mom by Fountains of Wayne.  It came to me one night.  It was SO obvious.  So, I realize some of the punctuation is not brilliant, but that’s because this is a parody.  I’ve also included a short version of the real song at the end for your entertainment.

"Hamlet's Mom"

Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on
Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on
Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on
Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on

Hamlet, why dost thou stop and stare?
I didn’t kill thy dad, I really swear
Did thy mom get back from evening prayer?
Is she there, or is she still braiding her hair?

You know, I'm not the uncle that I used to be
I'm all crowned up now, baby, canst thou see?

Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on
She's all I want and I've waited for so long
Hamlet, can't thou see? Thou art not dethroning me
I know it might be wrong, but I'm in love with Hamlet's mom

Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on
Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on

Hamlet, dost thou remember when I slew thy pawn?

Thy mom came out with five dresses on
I could tell she liked me from the way thou glared
And the way she said, "He must not be spared"

And I know that thou thinks it's just a fantasy
But since thy dad died young, thy mom could use a king like me

Hamlet's mom hath got it goin' on
She's all I want, and I've waited so long
Hamlet, can't thou see? Thou art not dethroning me
I know it might be wrong, but I'm in love with Hamlet's mom

"Stacy's Mom"

Stacy, can I come over after school?
We can hang around by the pool
Did your mom get back from her business trip?
Is she there, or is she trying to give me the slip?

You know, I'm not the little boy that I used to be
I'm all grown up now, baby can't you see

Stacy's mom has got it goin' on
She's all I want and I've waited for so long
Stacy, can't you see you're just not the girl for me
I know it might be wrong but I'm in love with Stacy's mom

Stacy, do you remember when I mowed your lawn?
Your mom came out with just a towel on
I could tell she liked me from the way she stared
And the way she said, "You missed a spot over there"

And I know that you think it's just a fantasy
But since your dad walked out, your mom could use a guy like me

Stacy's mom has got it goin' on
She's all I want, and I've waited so long
Stacy, can't you see you're just not the girl for me
I know it might be wrong,
but I'm in love with Stacy's mom